邊界遊移，小白杖與情慾－一個盲同志的認同路徑與實踐

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Title:	邊界遊移，小白杖與情慾－一個盲同志的認同路徑與實踐 Boundary Vagrancy : The Cane and the Lust The Identification Pattern and Praxis of a Blind LGBT
Authors:	李鴻傑 (Lee, Hong-Jie)
Contributors:	心理輔導學系
Keywords:	盲人男同志自我認同敘說探究 Blind Gay ego identity Narrative Inquiry
Date:	2019
Issue Date:	2019-06-12 11:34:46 (UTC+8)
Abstract:	摘要本論文以敘說探究的方法，回看一名盲人男同志自我認同的路徑。透過故事性的再現，梳理此雙重主體如何生成，進而欣賞與詮釋，理解一路走來的軌跡。論文主要分為三個部分：第一部分，文獻回顧，文獻由探究意識向外擴展，我從障礙同志主體思索，圍繞此雙重主體進行紋線探討，並闡述我作為一個盲同志與文獻來回理解與對話，生命經驗與知識的對照。分三大概念:「自我認同」、「歧視」與「污名」。第二部分，挖掘小時讀盲校的生活。說故事過程中，召喚出我看得見的視覺記憶，還沒失明之前的明朗色塊，多年以後，這些色彩仍存放我心中。盲校的童趣，也帶我進入文字中跟著小時候的我玩耍，盲人之間的觸摸經驗，集體住宿青少年的情慾探索，我那不知如何理解性向自我定位的迷惘與困惑。第三部分，出盲校進入一般明眼人的世界，透過回看過往大學時期，看見出盲校的不適應，日常形式的轉變，同時，此時期男同志主體忽隱忽現。開啟了同志主體時間軸，另一個世界，去摸索與認受同志身分，實體生活擺盪盲與同之間。最後，反思與討論中，整理出雙重主體自我認同的發展歷程，辨識雙主體對我的意義。書寫至此，生命自我定位是不斷變化的過程，「搞清楚你是誰」要放置時空中反覆探究，故事來到一個段落，實踐的路持續前行。 Abstract This study conducts the methodology of Narrative Inquiry to review the identification pattern of a homosexual male. Through reproducing the narrative to comb the development of the dual subjects; further, to appreciate, interpret, and understand the tracks along the way. The essay consists of three main parts: Part One: Literature review. The literature review extends from the inquiry of awareness by pondering the subject of disabled LGBT and surrounding the dual subjects of the essay. Afterward, to elaborate it as me being a blind LGBT, to progress the understanding and conversation back and forth with the literature review, and to reflect each other through life experiences and the literature. It is divided into three main concepts: ego identity, discrimination, and stigma. The Second Part explores the childhood experience in the school for the blind. Through storytelling to arouse the visual memories about bright colors before my eyes were damaged, which are the memories in my mind despite many years later. The childlike experience in the school for the blind has brought me into the context and played with the childhood self; the touch sensation between blind people, the adolescent sexual exploration while group accommodation, and the incomprehensible confusing and puzzled ego identity. Part Three is the period after stepping into the world of ordinary people. To look back on the university studies and present the not adapted experience outside of the school for the blind. The changes of daily life combine with the flicker of the subject of homosexuality, which opens the subject timeline of LGBT. In a separate world to explore and accept the awareness of LGBT whilst maintaining the life swings between blindness and homosexuality. Finally, to organize the development of the dual subjects about ego identity during the reflection and discussion, as well as recognizing the meaning of dual subjects to myself. To this point, the self-positioning of life is a dynamic process. To ‘understand who you are’ is a topic that should be placed in the time and space to explore repeatedly. The narration comes to a pause; however, the praxis keeps forward.
Appears in Collections:	[Department of Counseling Psychology & Graduate Institute of Counseling Psychology ] thesis

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